Thursday, 28 January 2010

One of the side effects of spending a great deal of time 'social networking' is that when I do go out, I find it much easier to speak to real people in a positive way. I have learned from Facebook that real people like perky people, that everyone likes to be spoken to as an equal and that eye contact and flattery will get you everywhere and everything, almost. Infact, I think I just find people more interesting now. I went to Bristol today on various fools errands and goose chases.

First off I watched a woman passenger get out of a huge jag and do that silly hand signal back back back STOP! thing for the man driver. He came within a gnats whisker of whacking the hell out of his tail lights and she was beating on the boot and shouting. When she saw me laughing, she laughed too. We agreed she'd had a close call and on we went with our days.

Then the moody mare in the changing rooms. I had to woo and beguile her, but I won her over in the end, after the fourth visit. The girl on the till was great. She didn't mind when I took three things back five minutes after buying them, because I made fun of myself and explained (untruthfully) that I was taking pills for it but they hadn't kicked in yet. Same with the Security Ape holding the door in Harvey Nix. I said 'Hi, thanks' walked in, stopped stock still, looked around like the dinosaur sniffing the air for edible kids in the kitchen scene in Jurassic Park. Security Ape almost grabbed my arm and led me to a chair, but instead asked me if he could help. I explained that it was my age and that I didn't know why I was there, laughed and went for lunch.

The Apple shop was the most fun. I almost started a rave in there, music, headphones, silicon covers and a good loud play on the iPad which looks like it will be a must have when they iron out the inevitable glitches. The geek serving me had the thickest glasses on I have ever seen and was charming and energetic and enthusiastic. His beardy weirdy fellow technogeek (aged about 50) was wearing an Apple t-shirt over his shirt but wry and witty inspite of that sartorial confusion. Clever than he looked, obviously.

So, in this current Pollyanna frame of mind, I'm off to the pub, singing 'I'd like to teach the world to sing..' by the New (thank you Nicky, Ed.) Seekers with butterflies rather than frogs flitting about in my headbox. I can feel a Coyote Ugly session coming up, but that is possibly best left until Saturday night. No partying on school nights.


  1. You ARE brilliant (lower case b)Don't write a book. It would take you away from us.

  2. Oh but Dids, when will I ever get it all sorted out so it makes sense, and flows? I need a plot.